Nostalgia's Playlist
Finding Wisdom Between Radio Stations
I don’t know about you folks, but I’m getting thirsty. I’m not looking for Mountain Dew, whiskey, or a frothy Guinness.
Drank plenty of that stuff in my younger days.
After spending a couple of decades drinkin’ and carryin’ on like Chris Farley, alcohol loses its thirst-quenching properties, so you have to find something else to whet your whistle.
Don’t get me wrong. I still dabble in the drink, but my days of getting tuned up and streaking through the quad are in the rearview.
They said we all gotta grow up sometime. Turns out I wasn’t immune to settling down after all.
It took a while for me to find my thirst-quencher, but I finally found it late in 2018 when I was working deep in the glands of the crop consulting pyramid, and the boss sent me to the Prairie Grains Conference in Grand Forks.
Knowledge is what I’m after.
I’m not interested in getting the crop off and tucking the machinery away to hibernate so I can sit on the couch binging The Sopranos for the eleventeenth time.
Just because we’re not physically farming doesn’t mean I’m not thinking about it.
Like a guy who can’t get over his ex-girlfriend no matter how many times she runs his name and his mind through the muck, this stuff never shuts off.
Whether learning about how conflict scenarios around the black sea affect the global wheat market or managing precision agriculture data, I’m always looking to top off my learning bucket.
After my first Prairie Grains half a decade ago, I was addicted to ag meetings. I signed up for every winter meeting possible.
I’d make this a full-time winter gig if I had the means.
Kkkktschhkk crnkllsht crackle…
I'm the Scatman
Ski-bi dibby dib yo da dub dub
Yo da dub dub
Crackle psssshtt tschkkshhh…
It’s like ray-eee-ain on your wedding day.
It’s a free riiiiiide when you’ve already paid
Pssssaaat crnkllsht…
Anywhere you go, I’ll follow you down
I’ll follow you down, but not that far
Kids today don’t know how good they have it.
Okay, I get it.
I’m old, but still, I have to say it.
May 1996 was a bangin’ year for tunes. Far better than the garb on the airwaves today.
Now I sound really old.
But really, man. Iphones. Spotify. YouTube. Audible.
With a Ram Mount, I could turn the tractor into a home theater if I wanted to.
Only thing missing would be the popcorn.
Now that I’ve adequately aged myself, I’ll remind you it never used to be this way.
Back in the day, we had to wait to sing along with The Scatman.
Do you know how difficult it is for an eleven-year-old kid to wait, sometimes all day or maybe not, to hear his favorite song?
The funny thing is, we didn’t think anything of it. We just…waited. We waited, and we surfed the stations.
Not only was it a different time, it was a different life.
I remember once whining to my Uncle Dupee (it’s pronounced Doo-Pee) that the radio in the 4440 didn’t come in when I harrowed in a particular direction and got all peeved when he crapped on my plans to start harrowing in another direction so I could listen to The Crossroads by Bone Thugs N’ Harmony in crispy, crunchy analog sound.
Uncle promptly told me that the 4020 he ran as a kid didn’t even have a radio.
Touchee, Uncle D.
The point is that you can’t stop progress.
Today, we don’t have to wait for a thing, and now that I’m about the same age as my uncle when he told me about his deprived childhood, it’s my turn to rip the younger generations for not having to experience a crackly radio or a tractor that didn’t steer itself.
Not that I want to rip anybody. It’s just a fun way to look at how much things have changed and wonder what my son’s generation will say to the one after that.
But here’s the thing. Uncle Dupee’s Uncle probably gave him a hard time enjoying the luxury of a cab on his tractor, just like his Uncle’s Uncle might have been jealous of his nephew who got to run a tractor instead of a horse.
Hhere’s the thing. Every now and then a tool comes along that not only changes the game, it revamps the entire sport.
The innovative and wonderful creatures at Milwaukee (actually pronounced mil-e-walk-que, as Alice Cooper shares in 90s blockbuster Wayne’s World) Tools have done it.
I don’t care if you own a farm or golf course, car dealer, corn maize, or Pawn shop.
The Milwaukee Tools 18v battery air-er-upper thing (close enough idk) is as mandatory as a toothbrush.
Now you can crank out the tires on that Seven Axle wonder bus while pissing time away on insta or x.
What a great country.